don't stop laughing

some other laughing stuff... i like the jumping jack and uppercut video... EPIC!!! LOL....

another laughter

5 mins break... YOUTUBE! xD

horrifying weekend

im afraid that this weekend is the worst... i couldnt stand the time i wasted and the time i should have studied... i could have finish PRP and PP by now... bt still i havent finish ANY OF THEM!!! GOSH!!!!!! im spending too much time dilly-dally-ing....

*slap slap... wake up!!!!!!!!!!! arh!!!!!!!!! i nid super alot of ice and coffee for this coming week... i have to finish everything by thursday cuz my family is coming on friday.. i wouldnt have time to study... is going to be crazy that time.... i got to have the feeling of studyness!!!!!!

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

okok.... screaming is wasting energy + time....
no time to waste... chaos~

Loving my "Enemies"

last few days was tight and busy... all because of the practical exam and the biotech quiz... practical was unexpected and i got double zeroes... quite dissapointed as i put alot of effort in preparing myself for the quiz... stuff like changing the concentration and doses should be taken very well by a pharmacist... and i guess is a good wake up call for me that i nid to go another mile...

well, being dissapointed does not mean giving up or just being negative about the results... i was disspointed.. no doubt... but at the same time... im looking forward for the biotech quiz... without wasting any much time or effort on aseptic practical... biotech shud be the next target...

however, ppl's point of view are diff as they tinks that u are in a dissapointment state and u're on ur way to destruction or going to give up... i guess that's how or which way u're looking at it.. perhaps... i should say... thgs change now... they change for a better... how much they can trust u? how much people will see the difference? i dont mind much of it... as long as i know ... im doing the right thg..

well, im not pointing to anyone or indirectly "shooting" to anyone... but people that are closest to you sometimes are the people that doesnot understand u the most.. sometimes u're enemy understand u more than ur best frens... that's why Jesus says love ur enemy.... i want to be better in the sence that... i may be able to forgive others more and love others... and in return... i will love and forgive myself...

in some conditions where sometimes when ppl miss understood or interpret wrongly of what u do and what u say.. and gives them a bad impression about u... i guess... i can only say... theres nothing much u can do... u cant please everyone.. because everyone will have different opinions about urself... i learn to accept that.. people.. even friends that hates, jealous, mock, even curse u... because i know.. that i will do that which is a sin... but i shall forgive them and forgive myself... for i know..this is not the truth that will set me free from all these stuff...

i duno how many ppl will read this post... but i felt that it is important to be able to really forgive and love the person... but i am willing to forgive and love them... with all my heart... and... truthfully... i will not even prejudice against them even for watever thgs they did against me...

Looks and Love #2

in addition to the previous post... watch susan boyle... i guess she is the best example to looks and love... perhaps.. in this society we are too blinded by looks... because everythg we see is looks... and where is the love?

PLEASE WATCH....susan boyle~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY&feature=related

Looks and Love

it is strange, i felt at 1st... no matter how gud u are, as long as u are not in the position... ppl wont look at u.. nor even would be kind enough to be with u..the moment when u look at them in the eyes, they will turn away from you and leave u to die!!! ONLY the STRONGEST WINS!!!!

is this nature? is this just wat we are ought to be?! how can a person be alone? he cant live without frens!! but it is strange that these thgs do happen around us.... EVERYDAY!!! is this why the suicide rate is going up in our country? is this why we cant live like how we are ought to live? is this HOW LOVE SURPOSE TO BE?!!

i duno whats the correct answer for it... but whenever there is LOVE.... there is always HOPE! when we have the hope... we will cling on to it..and do what ever we can to keep the HOPE alive... thats what's diff between Looks and Love? we hate the way ppl look at us... but how we look at people? reflection of love does play how much you look at people and how u display love with forgiveness?

well, thgs are very realistic in this world... but we are ought to live out the life that is faithful and different from the world... that's our calling as christians... to have the relationship with the almighty and to be in the world but not of the world... but connected together with the almighty with Love and to love others as we are to be loved... is strange rite? i hope u get wat i mean..

with Hope and Love... we stranggle to continue to live it... breathing the last of every breath... knowing that we are doing the right thg.. ignoring wat people may tink of it... is it true? is this whats looks and love like?

Italiannies!!!!!!!!

Finally the continuous 2 day quiz was over... i can get back on track with my sleep and studies... phew... however, there is still aseptic pratical and biotech quiz next week... and soon is going to be FINALS!!!!! ARH!!! i cant stop thinking about it... makes me wanna vomit when i tink about exams now...

the past few days was aseptic theory and pharmacokinetics quiz... and it is continuously for 2 days... the week b4 when i know about the quiz date, i knew is going to be a hard time for me... the worst thg that happen is my slp... Day turns to nite and nite turns to day.. i was like a dead man walking to college everyday and depending just on caffeine... i know is spoilting my body but i could not take any advice but put my priority on my studies than my health... is stupid but when u're desperate like me... is a sacrifice i have to make... if i had a choice i would not choose it... ( i know many ppl dun agree with it.. but i choose to do it.. haha )

aseptic was ok... i could attemp the ques... but when comes to pharmacokinetics... i guess most of my energy was drained out after aseptic quiz... after the aseptic quiz, i went back and slp from 2pm and planned to wake up at 5pm... but by the time i open my eyes... i got shocked and forgotten the time and date already because it was dark and i almost tought i was blind because i couldnt see anythg... it was really scary for me... realising tat i slpt for 7 hours and extra 4 hours from the time i planned.. i decided not to slp until 10am the next day after quiz... with the notes that i didnt really had time to study yet... i was really scared... and prayed hard... immediately... went down... buy bread and 1 stack of coffee and start flipping through the notes... i couldnt really get it into my head cause i know doing this is crazy..and i would not want to see myself doing this again especially for finals...

then 9am comes... sitting in c210, i holding the paper sweating and feeling dizzy... i barely could concentrate because the caffeine was not really strong enough... i just drank 6 cups of it.. (looks like coffee is really taking me down) i focus and concentrate with every single strength that left inside my body... just to force myself to concentrate on that 1 hour... MCQ was ok... when it comes to SAQ.... Q2... duno... Q3... forget....Q4...how to derive ar?... Q5.. im sweating even more now... FORGET EQUATION!!!... Q6....is this equation same as Q5? OH NO!!!!!!!!.... Q7.... wat factors??? can i just crap?? Q8... no nid to do la.. is wasting time....

at that moment.. i almost stand up and tell the lecturer... "sorry dr loga.. i tink i cant do this ques... i not feeling well. can i resit this paper or just let it go? or could u help me? or give me some extra time or WATEVER!!!! JUST GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!!" i couldnt take it any longer... and then, dr loga was beside me... smiling away... looking at me.... i slowly held my head up and smile back to him... he said, "r u ok?".. i said... "er.....r.......yea..... hehe..he...ehe..." then i looked back at my paper.... "OH NO!!!!!!! I CANOT LET DR LOGA DOWN!!! i cant let my parents down... this is the last choice... either i ask pauline to help... or curi tengok... (pauline was beside me) but dr loga is there............" "nononononO!!! i canot cheat.. CANOT!!.... how??HOW?!!!" then i looked around and stunned for about 10 mins.... sweating even more.... my mind STOP for a moment.... then i was blanked.... i closed my eyes and prayed.. (nearly fell aslp... ) then i looked at Q8 again.... and started to copy the ques......i copied few times... then SUDDENLY.. out of no where.. i started to rmb the answers from the notes.. and go back to Q7... Q6... Q5...Q4...3...2..1..!!! i slowly finish them... haha..but the time was almost too short.. i nearly couldnt do it... hopefully i did them correctly.. cause it was quite a rush when i rmb the answers.. haha... it was a relieve and reli thank God that i could able to answer them... haha...

MESSY ROOM!!! = =
This is how a room looks like when u're desperate... haha.. i duno how many ppl's room's like mine

This big moth juz fly into my room when i went for toilet.. scare the hell out of me... O_O

right after the PK quiz.. i went back and have a short nap... then manage to wake up and go to MV for ITALIANIES~~~~ my 1st ever to a nice restoran... WOHOO~~ great time and great place... wow... lovely place.. nice food and of cuz... good companionships... wonderful friends... wahaha.. laughing all the way home... HAPPY BIRTHDAY to HAN BOON and KAM HONG!!! =) ( sorry for the wrong day calling and wishing u, han boon... my fault mistaken... must be the caffeine effect... haha)

Enjoying every piece of the pizza.. YUM!! ( take note of my eye bags...O_O )

1st time eating raw salmon with pizza... NICE!!!! ^^

Breeze BAY~~~ Mixed drink recipe...

~~~PASTA~~~

Lastly... fried sotong with special sauce... the best i ever had...

Photo Session after makan... hehe...

then.....

is time for the BIRTHDAY.... DONUTS?!!!!

i tink is special and nice to have a different birthday with DONUTS! =) memorable.. haha

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAN BOON and KAM HONG!!!!

EW!!!! wahaha.. DONUT SPLASH!!

EVERYONE SMILE~!

ok la... i guess thats all for now.. haha... tml got early morning class... i dun wnt to miss again.. haha.. chaoz.. ^^

Filling up my time with Poems~ xD

everytime i write.. i got kinda stomachache one.. =.=" i duno y.. haha... btw, i noe this poem is quite fairy tale, old fashion and kinda impossible.. but just have fun writing them... haha.. enjoy~



every page of my life is you
everyday of my soul has light
i wonder if you knew
how much i missed you

even if i could just say it out
but you wouldnt want to listen
if u knew how much i want to say it loud
I LOVE YOU more than distance

Many have fall, many have fail
many to come and i shall prevail
and i shall take you as my bride
to a far away land, we shall sail

now that i am here with you
is more than i could wish ever
to cherish you and stand by you
and to love you forever

Wats wrong with me?

trapping myself against the book again... hopefully this semester i can pass all... i was tinking alot when studying in library today... guess is call "flying out" of the books... =.=" but i manage to finish at least 5 notes in that few hours in library with kuen and shereen... trying my very best to focus...

however, i was tinking of my pass in this pharmacy course and looks like i had my ups and downs.. but i duno y i was quite negative about the feeling of this semester... i felt like i was not good enough...

not enough hard work? waste too much time? not focus?

i was quite trouble even until now......

well, it gives me a feeling of giving up.. bt i know that giving up is not a choice now... im already at the end of my semester... if i give up now.. i will be the biggest fool...

promise myself to do my best for this coming aseptic and pharmacokinetic quiz... to my fellow classmates... GAMBATEH!!! =)

thats all for now gtg .... aseptic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bigger and BIGGER!!

I guess growing up is always a struggle for me. i face problems everytime suiting to another different environment. is been almost 2 years studying in KL now. things are more or less easy for me now as i get use to the faily routine. waking up early, going to classes, finishing up reports, studying for classes, going to church and CG, practising guitar everyday............

in the prayer meeting today. God spoke to me to grow up. i guess i have to take another step forward again. when thgs get too comfortable, we tend to waste time doing thgs tat are not benificial. some times losing the momentum to move forward. is like climbing up a mountain. when u reach a pit stop, we will automatically let go of our baggage and tend to rest n stop moving upwards. when the time is up, we will always reluctant to move up the slope again and find ourselves difficult to move out of the comfort zone.

i guess i got to change some of my bad habits like finishing up my reports in time and planning my agenda in details than just brief lists. planning ahead, doing things at the right time and right place, practising the Word everyday. is all part of growing up to be bigger and BIGGER inside and outside... =)

Coffee + Bread ^^

a little crazy... and a little uneasy

well... not much to blog lately.. im kinda like lazy to blog wat happen today and what happen and so on.. cuz.. i guess is kinda like diary basis than blog.. haha.. diff definition on blog.. well, sometimes is crazy to do diff thgs

talking bout crazy... i know im sometimes crazy at home or even outside... i duno whether is becuz sometimes i cant control my emotions or feelings.... is juz that i like to be who i am in some places at certain times. haha. better isolate me.

sometimes shouding out of my lungs, singing unconditionally, air drumming and dancing like monkey in different situation... is quite weird wen u tink in the perspective of a stranger but is the joy i had inside. it juz come out sumtimes... especially when im with the music i love... ^^

it is more to say that i have my own way of expressions. but sometimes when it comes to troubles and problems.. i had problems to express as well. i duno whether it is normal or wat. but i since young i have problems in communications.. may be becuz i hav bad language command and vocabs... well, im learning though. slowly.... reading...

i dont have good reading habits... i dont like reading.. but well, man hav to read... reading Bible, reading notes, reading journals, books... anythg... like wat pastor said.. READ!!! haha... is a gud thg... but i juz hav to force myself to read... i had to learn the hard way... is uneasy... =/

a little crazy... a little uneasy.. perhaps there is more than juz to be in life to be sometimes in our own world... may be sharing? ^^ it remains a ques to me...

for someone to step into the realm.. it takes nt oni me to accept but others to understand... i guess is hard for people to reli understand the feeling 100%... oni God knows... i guess there's where conflicts come from. i have to understand others as well!! =.="

Growing up is another part of life... building a block a day... shining for another day... moving towards infinity... my life... i surrender.. ^^ jus wanna thank God for it..

i tink thats all... gonna cont study for PP now... all the best... ^^

work and rest~

lately didnt have much to share when i come to blogspot... quite lost in the sence that i guess i have lost the motivation to blog.. but anyway, i still blog.. haha.. juz for the sake of releasing stress and exploding out..

well, thgs are getting tougher as we come to the edge of the semester... thgs are not ready nids to be set up already... few more weeks and it will be our finals! stretching towards another level... sometimes i find myself working like crazy.. haha.. but it is rest that i found when i work... loving in everythg i do~

perhaps there is somethg more than i can defined as "busy" or "no time". it is more than juz an excuse for not being on the duty or willingness. many people juz try to do it.. but they fail to perservere... wat if i stumble? wat if i fall? i wouldnt wanna be the rest. i guess success is always taking the path which not many ppl can take. but everyone have their own path.. it depends on which success we are going for...but some of us may be going for the wrong thgs... just like wat pastor said... we may be climbing up the wrong ladder to cross the wall... but we will not know until we reach the top... we have to choose the right ladder and trusting the ladder to bring us up to another level and to success...

i guess is not that fun when we comes to work... but lately... i found out that playing keeps me lazy and not doing anythg makes me worst! if i keep my hands on the notes or at least the computer screen on my job than facebook... at least i am more motivated to learn somethg extra by juz reading thru people's blogs and websites... there's where i found rest.. haha.

well, i guess i had to stop nw and continue doing my biotech slides... juz to add some pics and colors... ^^ until then... chaoz~