Brain or no brain?

stopped blogging for sometime.. haha.. due to reasons like exams, busy with this and that but actually all these are just excuses... i did wrote some blogs but i deleted them.. .i duno y but i juz dun wan to blog JUST for the sake of blogging la.. i blog because I LOVE BLOGGING... ^^

ok...not reli much to talk about exams... PK didnt finish all the ques.. haiz.. too bad.. too many thgs to write.. should be enuf to pass unless i make silly mistakes... Biotech was the most horrible of ALL the exams... i wish i could pass and forget about everything on Biotech.. hehe

well, i was thinking about the quiz in facebook lately that i did.. is about the which brain that u usually use and tink. i got the answer that i use equally both brains... what does that mean? means i dun use my brain at all or i am genius that i can tink with both brains at once? i dun tink i am a genius...haha

is like feeling ur brains are fighting and they are like so contradicting but i am using both of them at the same time whenever... i dont really understand how it works but it works.. haha... thats why sometimes i am so confused myself too...

hm.. im kinda confused now wat am i talking about... ok la... now very blur and headache.. slp early and get rest... nitez

Thorns of a soul

Growing out from the inside,
blooms and grew,
running away and hide
away from the pain inside.

it brushes through my skin,
a deep, unforgiven sin,
creeping into my blood,
deeper it goes, deeper it hurts.

bitten by the poison,
infecting my internal organs,
my strength weakens,
my soul darkens.

the thorns of my soul...

Fish in Throat!

the battle goes on... today was tiring but it was ok. i would not want to talk much about it but it was a tiring day...

as usual, library and went to mamak... but i ordered a nasi lemak and i duno whether i was rushing or wat.. but it was going to finish already and i didnt notice that i accidentally choke on a ikan bilis!!!!!!

that stupid fish... swam to no where and fall into my throat... i was so aggitated by it... drank so much water and ate so much rice... but still dont work... i tried to poke it out with my fingers... and end up vomiting... gosh... my day gets worst... then i rush back home.. i couldnot put a smile again... it was to terrible that i cant stand it... i even brought some bread to clear it.. but it stills THERE!!!!!!

Does anybody knows whats the best way to clear off this stupid fish in my throat?

ok... i guess thats all... today is only about the fish... the battle is totally out of the story.. got to go back hiding in the notes again... gosh... bad fish... BAD FISH!!!

chaoz~

The battle goes on...

The battle was hot today... it was crazy... i couldn't feel my legs and thumbs after the battle... it was terrible that i slept in the library... = ="

the enemy was so strong... truly.. we were warned before and got wrong information that the total marks was surposed to be 75!!!!!! ( 25 MCQ each 1 mark and 2 out of 3 SAQ ques with each 25 marks ) in the end, it was 60!!!!!!! ( 20 MCQ and 2 out of 3 SAQ with oni 20 marks each ) i was shocked and couldnt tink much... the enemy was near and all i could do is just FACE IT!!!!!

after the battle, i was so tired and i could not and do not want to THINK ABOUT IT!!! so, went back to the same library discussion room and slept about 1 to 2 hours... and the whole day just not productive at all... until.. around 5pm after meeting with Dr loga.

we did some crazy stuff there... play some "stabilo stacko", "rubber shooting stabilo", "london bridge stabilo", "UCSI stabilo tower".... LOL... just like small kids to release some stress and forget about the pain from the Battle... it was fun and at least help me to regain some energy and confidence...

this week will be a terrible fight... we still got 4 more battles to go! mates, dun stop!!!!!!!! we must win this battle... next up..... PHYSICAL PHARMACY!!!!!!!!!!!!

nitez.... *too tired.......

Friends

Another wonderful message from Ps Pat Messeti... i was so blessed by his sermon for the last 2 days... it really keeps me going on and pushing me forward... i know is long... but im gonna cut it as short as possible...

How to be a good friend?

rule 1 : BE A NICE PERSON, NOT A JERK!!! "i am holy.. i go to church and i do everything according to God's word... i dont do this and that.. i cant be your friend" Save it.. we dont need this...

rule 2 : a few principles of being a friend... a friend restores and do not JUDGE someone when he is down or broken. and he continue on with 4 stages of being a friend : Introduction, Aqquintance, Friendship and Intimacy or Into-me-See!

there is 2 types of close friends... one if even the person is so close to you that he would kiss you... but one is the one that will sell u off and another is the one that will stay to support u... how do we know whether which is the friend indeed?

once.. Ps pat's friend told him that someone was talking negative thgs about him for 20 minutes.
Ps Pat : what did u do? what did u say?
her : i didnt know wat to say...
ps pat : u shud say that im your friend... how can u say that?
her : i really dont know wat to say... how can u hurt my feelings?
Ps pat : then be a friend of principles not a friend of feelings...

Jonanthan.. who was the son of King Saul... who is the king of israel at that time... it is found in 1 samuel 18 : 1-3. jonanthan shows his companionship with David after David returns to the king after he kill the goliath... Jonanthan was a companion, a friend to David.

Jonanthan sworn to serve David and fight with him... but in the end, he died when he fought with his father, King saul.... this is because.. he fight for the wrong battle... that was not his battle to fight and we cant fight for every battle... some battles are nt for us to fight for or fight with... we have to choose the right battle to fight for... Jonanthan fight that battle base on his emotion and not by principles...


5 things as a FRIEND :

1. jonanthan and david share the same PAIN... both of their fathers rejected them and they face the same rejection from a father... only pain can reveal ur friends... when the time of pain, friendship will show... the time when we are blessed, everybody will like to share with u but at time of pain, only true friends will share with u...
2. jonanthan was a son of a king, but he took off his robe and share his GLORY... a friend is a person who is willing to share his glory, his pride with another...
3. jonanthan also gave david his armor as protection... A good friend will protect a friend. saul's armor was not fit for him because saul wasnt a friend to david even though he gain saul's favor... however, a friend is a person that will protect u.. but not fight for u... this will encourage you to rely on them... we canot help everyone if the person do not care about his problem more than you do....
4. there is 2 swords in the kingdom and it was saul's and jonanthan's.... but saul's was too big and do not fit for small little david... but jonanthan gave his sword to david... what does the sword means? it means... if a friend give you their sword... it means if anyone attacks you, it won't be your friend because he dont have a sword... and the sword is usually symbolize as our WORDS.... WORDSWORDSWORDS.... only a good friend will guard his mouth...
5. Jonanthan also gave his Belt to David.. if not he will lose his pants and exposed!!!! a friend is a person that will cover our weaknesses... a good friend will supports your shield and give you the belt to cover your weaknesses

ok la... back to aseptic now... gonna rush through the nite... dreams are to be sweat and nights to be calm... NITEZ~

the moon is round,

the night without sound,

the sky is clear,

exams are near....

to go for another mile

with smiles,

this message from a friend

to cherish you for a while...

Boss round

2nd round with the boss was over... the battle was terrible... i nearly fainted at the field... it was fussy and frustrating... i know many of my war-members were hurt, i pray that they would get enough rest and healing to prepare for coming monday.

this battle was not easy. as i would have to struggle and wait patiently in the quarantine area while other war-members are in the field or "the garden" (describe by mr jony). many of them suffered coming out from the field... but some remain calm and relax...

while we were quarantine... my nerves was 110% up to my brain and down to my very toes... i could not feel my fingers and legs... i can feel my lips are numb... i was worried, anxious and scared that i was not prepared enough... "what if i was not prepared enough, wat if i make stupid mistakes...."

the moment i enter the field... i know i have no time to tink about anything more... and focus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! whispering the prayers in my heart and walking towards the table.........

i open the ques and didnt stop thinking and doing the ques... i wrote about 1 page of incompatibilities and dr yeong sign about 10 times for me... and in the end... i got the correct signature which is 250 microgram per dose... all i know that i have to finish the prescribtion already because i was 20minutes behind time... i did my best and finish 1 and half of the both prescription... i was proud and satisfied... even though my answer could be wrong or inaccurate... but i believe i do what i should do already and i have done my very best to answer the ques with all the knowledge i had..... the rest... is up to God now...

leaving the field... we went back camp and rest... and took a trip to the Holy Place (CHC) again... this time, the van was not on time and was 1 hour late... me, ray and eny waited for quite long and finally our angel, GiGi! with his car, 4 of us including pek lin was able to go to church... we were blessed to have him and able to accompany him... it was a answered prayer! this was all God's plan... blessed...

we missed worship but Ps Pat was great... i was blessed that even though we are late but we stil manage to sit in the auditorium although it was squizy but.. im blessed again...

a topic on "secret of relationship"... the whole sermon i was laughing non-stop... he is good... and one of the things that he said that inspire me is the 4 phases of man and 4 phases of woman

4 phases of man :

1. King - every man was to be the dominator... he wants to rule... this is to show his authority... not that he wants to be someone great but he was to have a dominion of his own.. and this is not democracy
2. Warrior - every man will fight for something... a trophy, a car, a prize... but every man should not fight with his wife... this is because he should fight FOR his wife... and wife should not fight with their husband... let him be the action... he has the way... let him!
3. Fool - well... i agree with that because sometimes guys really do stupid stuff... so is david.. dancing around with his underpants... uh! i wont do that bt sometimes i do stupid stuff like drawing circles at the corner and singing out like nobody's business.... forgive me...
4. Boy - this happens to be sometimes.. haha.. "when is he gonna grow up?! can he be more mature?" NEVER!!! well, nature of man...

it gets more interesting.... woman!

4 phases of woman :

1. Queen : every woman wants to be crown as prom queen or watever queen.... they just wants to have that attention or to be loved... cherish....
2. Lover : the romance in a woman is owez flowing... they are beings with emotions and the feeling inside is always on...
3. mother : no matter wat they will always be the mother of nature.. wahaha... i code that... LOL... well, very simple... example : when a woman saw a cute kitten... they will keep it and sayang it like a mother... well... womans... dont be a mother to ur husband... they dont nid another mother to tell them "have u eaten?" "do u need a rest?" "are u full?" well, when a mother see her son treated by his wife like a mother.... there's where the mother in law fight comes... haha
4. witch.... !! hm... i dont have to explain this much le bah... i gues... we all understand the witch!!.. haha...

We always expect the man to love the wife like the christ love the church BUT the man love his wife in correction with the love of chirst to the church with disciplines....

Love unconditionally... but for everyman... there is a RESPECT.. and respect is with conditions... girls sometimes do not understand this point and disrespect a guy that she can oni tink that "why he dont love me one?" but actually to a guy... respect is much more than just feelings... if we withhold the love... and couldnot love.. then a woman will not be able to show respect for the man and the man will withhold the love towards the woman... is a CIRCLE! =)

i like the last story he told before he ended... it is about a manwho find wives for people... and 1 day he found out that he actually is stil single.. so he look for a rich family guy with 7 beautiful daughters and 1 of them is less beautiful and less talented.. but the other 6 was taken oledi.. so the rich man say.. nvm la.. u pay 1/3 of the dowry is enough.. but the man pay full dowry.... and they get married...

after few years, one of his frens come and visit him and ask him how many wives u have already.... because in their culture they can mary many wives but then he say i only got 1... and is the 1st one i marry... the guy say u can tahan meh? that one is not pretty one.. but then the guy tell him that he has paid the full dowry which is 2 times the dowry that was set for her and she is the prettiest among the all... that is the worth of her... is the same as Christ paid the prize for us.. we didnt worth that much but he paid more than what we worth...

well, i guess i should stop here now... the time is almost 3am... another 4 hours the sun is coming up... and tml we will need to do more exercise and training.... monday will be soon coming.. and the next boss is coming... until then... CHAOS!!

Fear out, Faith In

2nd day of the war was much quiet... and things are more calm and easy.. but the enemy is still far but getting closer and closer... i got to get ready and use wat i have and maximise watever i have... doing more push ups and practising my muscles... i gain more power and strength...

had a great lunch with my fellow war-mates... celebrated a while with YING JUN! thgs have been great for her and we all can see that she had grown so much more than who she is before, the day she step into pharmacy course... wish her a great and wonderful year to come and do great in this coming FINALS! HAPPY 22nd Birthday! =)

*hopes she see this post!! =)

then times up! the whistle blows, the muscles need to continue working... relaxing too much will gain fat and get lazy... aiyoyo... push... 1,2,3! 1,2,3! 1,2,3....

night falls, the trumpet sounds... dinner skipped... gosh... but the spirit was filled... and the excitement was growing as we took a small journey out of the war field... arrived in time, and entered the holy place... bow in prayer and wanting just to be in the presence was just refreshing... releasing the fear inside and replacing the FAITH... and gaining more strength... suddenly, the tiredness of the body just lost....................

as i held my head up high, the inside of me enlarge... and builds up the inner me... so i would go another mile further... it gives me the confident that i once lost... i will use my best to do my best...

alrite... time to go back to camp and rest... is getting late... tml nids to o more push ups and training... the enemy is coming soon... i got to get ready!

Something different to appreciate...MuSiC~

MuSiC~ all it takes to describe it...

First day at the warfield!!!

is tough... the grass were tall.. the lines where thin... the parameters are scattered... trying to stay calm... running through the bushes.. slaying through the mud and sand...

the first day, on the pitch with full mud and dirt... but still, the fire inside is burning hot... i could not just stop there. running fast but quietly...

the test was tough but still i stood still and gain confident... 5 more to go... i got to stand strong!!! im afraid but i will not lose even a step forward...

i could see the enemy from far... but yet the road is still far. i have to move on now... the day is not early now...

nitez~

A must watch from BGT 2009!

oh gosh... its really touching to see someone like this to perform on stage... i nearly thought myself like this for once... but i don't have the talents to be on that position... but his singing just touch me...



people just don't believe that how good they are sometimes but reality is that they are... it really is amazing to watch people having great talents... is rare and not everyone has it... it may take years to develop and takes tonnes of effort to create a talent as such...

another example is susan boyle... really amazed me to the top most... i couldnt believe that moment when i watch the video... is really truly amazing...

The battle is NOW!!!!!!!

is almost done... the way to the top of the mountain has lead to this part... the biggest slope... i got to keep trying... helding my head high... all the fats and sweat is time to use... going to be pushing harder... im going to make it move... the battle is just not about me anymore, is not about how fast u race to it... but how you run this race!

some of us have sweat so much, some of us just take 2 steps... but in the end... we will know how much effort u put in when the results comes... i believe with all my faith... and i shall trust Him for all my days... this climb... i will not end until i reach the top, i will not give up and stop... and when i reach the top of the mountain... i shal open my eyes and feel the breeze... as the wind blows my tears away... it shall be the worth of the climb!!! GUYS!!! lets move on!


Good luck to my fellow friends... FINALS!!!!!!! slping early tonite... chaos~

Loose my soul

i dun want to loose myself for AMT~.. T_T.. okok... gambateh guys... AMT left 2 days nia... wuhuhu!!!! come on!!! we can do it...

enjoy this music guys! =)

cheers~!